This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
