Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
