Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
