i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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