Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i wish my penis had a tongue
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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