it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I love you. Go after that dick
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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