Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
