i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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