I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
