He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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