maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
don't judge my taste in strippers
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
