actually, I'm a sock model
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
