Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
