The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
