i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
