i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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