Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
