i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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