That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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