I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
