it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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