You work out of a Hotel?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
