Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
