so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
