butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Porn is love you can see.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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