It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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