You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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