Can i not drive my cunt home
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
