Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
