So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
