I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
