smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
