god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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