Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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