Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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