we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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