70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize