he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
