a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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