About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
