Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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