keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
