ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
