Your face is a jimmy john
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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