I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I look better un-naked...
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
