HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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