So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
