alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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