yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
