I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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